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Robin Williams has been dead for days now, and most of you might have read dozens of news-related stories already, but I chose to write this one today because truth be told, I didn't know what to think... about suicide, in particular and in general.
It wasn't until last night that I was finally enlightened.
I was raised as a Catholic who believed in mortal sin or sin that cannot be forgiven. It includes murder, and since suicide is virtually a kind of murder, it is automatically unforgivable. At least that's what the "doctrines" say. I believed that one automatically went to hell when he commits suicide.
Well, that really bothered me because in high school, a friend of mine, a pretty girl who is a "rich kid" who got everything she wanted, took her life by hanging herself with a scarf inside her closet. She was only 16.
But the idea that suicide was unforgivable remained. I'm ashamed to say it now, but I looked with disdain at those who commit it. You can throw stones at me because I'll be honest: I condemned them. In my eyes, they just did not fight hard enough.
Fast forward to several years when I became a Born Again Christian. I got to have a clearer understanding of Jesus and the Good News. Despite my many sins, I am saved. Halleluiah! But I still wasn't so sure about those who commit suicide. Truth be told, I never really bothered.
News about Robin Williams came, and though I adored him, I still was pretty much convinced that suicide was unforgivable.
Until last night.
I read a few articles about Williams' death, which got me wondering: if a person, who believes in Jesus and the power of his death and resurrection, commits suicide out of despair, would God be "merciless" enough to throw him to hell?
Image from Google (no clear source)
I immediately got a vague answer after that question: "Merciless" is never a word I would use to describe God. It's the anti-thesis of Him.
This means there must have been something wrong with my idea about suicide, so I read and reflected some more. Here are the revelations I got:
1. First, God is never merciless.
He is merciful. When God forgives, there are no but's, there are no if's. There are no caveats or conditions to meet. I don't know about you, but I think God will comfort a child who suffered so much anguish that he thought death was the only way out.
Lamentations 3:22
The LORD'S loving kindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail.
2. Second, being saved is a gift that God doesn't take away.
Once a person is saved and becomes a real Christian, no matter what he does, he will remain saved. Nothing we do can separate us from Jesus' redeeming power.
Titus 3:5
He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit,
3. Death has no power over Jesus.
Suicide is a sin, and if committing it cancels out salvation, it sort of means like this human act is more powerful than Jesus' divine saving act. This cannot be true. Remember, Jesus conquered death.
2 Timothy 1:10
...but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel.
4. Jesus died for all sins.
When Jesus died on the cross, he bore all of humanity's sins. This should include suicide because if not, this means His death has a loophole. It means His death wasn't 100% effective and that Satan still has a fighting chance of defeating Him, and this is not true at all.
1 John 2:2
[Jesus] is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.
5. There is only one unforgivable sin mentioned in the Bible.
Honestly, I just can't see anything in the Bible that says suicide is unforgivable. If brutal murder is forgivable, why can't suicide be? Plus, Jesus mentioned of only one unforgivable sin: blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. Not suicide.
Matthew 12:31-32
And so I tell you, every kind of sin and slander can be forgiven, but blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven. Anyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven, but anyone who speaks against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven, either in this age or in the age to come.
Considering all of the points above, this simply means that there is no sin (other than doubt of the Holy Spirit) that is unforgivable. If there is, Jesus' death and resurrection would have been a lie, and it is not! The truth is Jesus conquered death and sin by dying and coming back to life.
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There is no sin more powerful than Jesus, and no sin is beyond His forgiveness. Murder is forgivable, so even though my limited human mind can't comprehend it, even the man who raped and killed the 11-month old can be forgiven. Therefore, I believe that suicide, too, is forgivable.
As to what kind of suicide or person God will forgive, I have no idea. Only God knows.
Romans 9:16
So then it does not depend on the man who wills or the man who runs, but on God who has mercy.
All I know is that I'll surely remember Robin Williams as the brilliant actor of my childhood. His suicide shouldn't define him, and I pray he finds (found?) forgiveness and happiness with God.
I pray that you, too, find this forgiveness and happiness while you're still blessed with a life.
PS: Suicide, I believe, is forgivable, but it should never be an option. If you think you have no way out, remember that there is the way: Jesus.
If you need a friend, whoever you are, I'll gladly make time for you. Just contact me, even anonymously. I know what sad and lonely and desperate feels, and I'll listen.
But more importantly, I believe no one knows more about loneliness and despair than Jesus.
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