What is a good mom?

Yuri's "gift" to me. A "basket" daw with "bananas."

Hallmark doesn't make any money from me because I don't celebrate holidays except for Christmas, Easter, and birthdays. I looove these major holidays, but I see the "rest of 'em" as just ordinary days.

I don't even celebrate Valentine's Day, much less Mother's Day.

I guess that's just how we were raised. My family is not big on celebrating birthdays na nga, Mother's Day pa? The same can be said for Job, although he tries to send me simple "special" messages on those occasions (but I love the just-because messages more...)

But there's one person who never fails to send me heartfelt greetings on Mother's Day. That's Honey, Yuri's ate or yaya.

Although I'd never admit it to her face (sorry, I was never the expressive type), I feel blessed that God sent her to us to help me take care of Yuri. That's even though she makes me want to scream sometimes, okay, many times. I mean, ako yung may event pero 10 minutes nalang ako nakapaghanda kasi she took 40 minutes to get dressed? Mga ganun.

But that's off-topic hehe. Really, I feel blessed because in spite of her kaartehans and, sometimes, disobedience, I believe in my heart that she truly loves Yuri. I think that's the most important trait you would ever need to find in a yaya.

Going back to Mother's Day, that early morning, while Yuri was still sleeping and I was laughing over a joke Job cracked, I received this text message:

Of course I was touched. Who wouldn't? I don't think all household have helpers who are as thoughtful as Honey. But never being the emotional type, I immediately thought, "Oh no, she thinks so highly of me. Whatever have I done to deserve that?"

First of all, I'm far from the alpha-perfect mom image. I let my child eat sweets and processed foods. I don't really care when he touches something dirty. Sometimes I give him what he wants when he throws tantrums. There have been times when I want Yuri to go away because I'm busy or stressed at work - though I will never have the heart to tell him that.

I am not "the best mom ever." I let Yuri watch TV and play with gadgets so that I can rest after working. I sometimes tell him to pee in his diaper because I'm too sleepy or lazy to get up and accompany him to the potty. Sometimes I let him bite on a toy that I know is dirty. One time, I even let him eat a lollipop.

And then I thought, maybe Honey thinks I'm a good mom because I like buying him stuff? I was just bored and wala akong magawa sa pera.

Or maybe it's because I'm into attachment parenting? Actually, wala naman akong alam jan. Nakikiuso lang ako.

Of course I'm just kidding. In the last two paragraphs anyway.

My point is this: what does it take for one to be called a good mom? The best mom? It's so hard to just be a regular mom, so how can we strive for good or even best?

What is a good mom? Is she the one who works or the one who stays home? Is she the commander-in-chief or the domestic diva? Is she the attachment parenting mama or the cry-it-out mom? Is she the helicopter mom, the tiger mom, the long-distance mom?

Frankly I don't know. All I know is that if God blessed us with children if, that means being mothers is part of our life plans. It's in the blood. It's in our DNA structure. All the plans and all the detours in the world would ultimately lead us to this path. And if we are destined to be mothers, I believe that whatever kind of mother you are, as long as God and your family occupy a big part of your heart, you can be good. As long as you become more like Jesus in maturity, guidance, wisdom, strength, and unconditional love, you can be the best.

And sometimes, we have to believe that.