Finance Friday: The Social Climber

Photo: http://www.andbethere.com

The social climber, for me, is someone who "needs" to have the latest and the current best. She feels the "need" to upgrade her lifestyle to keep up with what's new. Thus, while she earns more, she also spends more and saves less, a decision that only she and her family will suffer.

If you're looking for a blog post that badmouths a certain social climber (or, well, gold-digger), I'm sorry; you're in the wrong place.

It's not that I don't write about gossip (which is somehow true).

It's because the social climber can be easily you. And me.

Now that I have your attention (I hope), come to think of it. Since you started earning money, how many times you have received a raise? From that answer, how many times have you upgraded your lifestyle? Once? Twice? Each time your income increased?

Because let's face it:

Social-climbing is dangerously easy.

I'm confident to ask you these questions because I am on the same ground. Just recently, I realized that on good months, I am now earning almost 50% more of what I used to earn last year. As a freelancer, I technically don't receive a raise. However, as Yuri becomes more independent from me, I am also able to do more work in a day. Hence, more income.

And I'm not complaining at all! I'm praising God for this increase in His provision! The problem is that there is no increase in my savings. On the contrary, there is a big increase in my spending.

Why is that? I find it easier to buy stuff now because I know how much I earn. I don't feel the need to tighten my belt anymore (which is wrong). So each time I see something that strikes my fancy, I no longer hesitate as much. It may not be the typical "social-climbing" as we know it, but I have to admit that I'm trying to "upgrade my lifestyle" by pursuing material excitement.

And instead of cruising the highway to financial independence, it only takes me back to a lifestyle where I need to keep up with the Joneses.

Photo: blissinimages.com

It's a bitter pill to swallow, but are you on the same boat? If you are, don't worry. Let's do this together! Here are some things we need to keep in mind to battle the social-climbing sickness:

1. Ask this basic question: Is it a need or a want?

Do you really need the latest smartphone to do your work or do you just want it to impress your colleagues?

2. Focus on saving.

This is what Job repeats to me every chance he gets because he knows my tendency to buy a lot of things for Yuri.

Now, income increase is part of life. However, did you ever wonder why people who earn so much have little in their accounts? It's because of what they think is necessary lifestyle upgrade. A good guideline to follow is this: Maintain the same lifestyle you've had when you were earning less. Save and/or invest the difference.

3. Never (ever!) borrow to finance a lifestyle upgrade.

I keep repeating this about credit cards: They're only a tool for transaction. They're not genies.

Photo: http://blog.mycreditspecialist.com/

It's really simple actually. If you can't afford it with cold cash, then you can't afford it! In my opinion, it's only right to borrow money for housing or for business (good debts). But to buy a gadget? Please no.

4. Be a wise shopper.

I don't think it's realistic to never buy material stuff for ourselves. However, there's always the option to not to splurge on items, and there's always the option of buying just one long-lasting item.

Don't buy something just because of its brand name. If it's beyond your budget, find an alternative! For example, instead of buying a Longchamp bag (P10k) for your everyday bag, why don't you look for leather bags that are made locally? I personally have a Cuzo bag and its quality is remarkable. I did not go for the "cheap" ones that are made of poor and flimsy material.

Also, weigh the "real costs" of the item. Some cost more but are really more valuable investments. For example, recently, I made the decision to stop using plastic utensils for eating. I bought glass and stainless steel cups for Yuri because even though they cost more, they last longer and are a lot healthier than plastic.

Finally, shop with "long-term" in mind. I actually pride myself on being a long-term gal. Aside from friendships and my relationship, my things also last a long time. My phone, my computer (which is still working perfectly and I wouldn't have replaced if it weren't for the brownouts), even my clothes! I kid you not; I still wear some of the shirts I wore back in 3rd grade!

5. Practice the art of delayed gratification.

The reason why things I own last long is not necessarily because they're perfect. They're not, actually. However, since I was a young girl, I've been trained to value things because if they get lost or broken, I'd have to work hard to replace them.

Photo: ellybeanstalks.blogspot.com

That sounds a lot like a relationship advice, doesn't it? Hee hee. Seriously, though, I'm a master at delayed gratification. I can crave a certain food now and it would be okay if I have to wait for weeks before I can finally have it. I can get intrigued with a popular movie now but can easily wait until it gets shown on cable. I've been entertaining the thought of replacing my almost 2-year old phone but cannot simply because it's still working. It's really cool because I don't need the pressure to stay "updated."

Everything is now instant. However, I believe delayed gratification is one of the most crucial values one has to learn if he wants to achieve financial freedom. No one ever achieves true success in the short-term. Saving, investing - they all take time and patience.

6. Remove the entitlement mentality.

I used to have an entitlement mentality. In my generation, it is rare not to have it. We think we deserve to have stuff because we "worked" for it.

Photo: http://thirtysixmonths.com/

Now, I actually cringe when I see shopping, eating, or pampering posts with the caption, "I deserve this." Yes, it's not bad to indulge every once in a while, but do we really deserve it?

Well, news flash: If we actually got what we deserved, we would all be rotting in hell now. It's not a pretty picture but it's true. I mean, how many times do we sin on a daily basis? It's only through God's Grace that we're living blessed lives and only through Jesus' redemption that we can be in Heaven.

From this perspective, do you really deserve all those material stuff?

7. Be happy with what you have.

I need to practice what I preach here because even though I can delay my gratification, it doesn't mean I don't "want" things. I do because I'm ambitious!

However, we have to know that when God promises a good life for us, it doesn't automatically mean a "materially-filled" one. Sometimes, a good life means happiness and contentment with what we already have.

This is why I am not impressed with people who keep changing their phones, cars, etc. It seems to me that these people are those who "need" to get their hands on whatever is latest. And for what? To impress the neighbor? Frankly, it doesn't make sense to me. Whenever will you stop upgrading?

Aside from being in a vicious cycle of social climbing, I find discontent very dangerous because it breeds sin. Envy, pride, greed, anger. Isn't it scary? And it steals our joy, the very joy that is rooted in our God and not in material belongings.

Photo: http://year27.com

Just a brief statement regarding the verse above: I find it funny how most only quote the last part - the promise part - of the verse, the one that says God will never leave or forsake us. And this is true. However, it is funny how we conveniently forget the first part - the command part - of the verse, the one that says how we should not love money and be content with what we have.

Question: I work hard so that I can afford to buy what I want. I work hard so that I can provide for my family. Why can't I upgrade my lifestyle?

This is a question I sometimes ask, too, so let's turn to the ultimate authority. The Bible says that everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial (1 Corinthians 10:23).

To upgrade our lifestyles is something we can do. As I pointed out, it is frighteningly easy. So it is permissible. But is it beneficial?

No, it's not, because it pollutes our understanding of the basic concept: need vs. want.

No, it's not, because it removes the focus on saving, investing, and wise spending.

No, it's not, because it is a breeding ground for sin.

And finally, no, it's not, because it diminishes the value of finding joy and contentment in what we have and especially in the Lord.

Photo: http://notthatkindofgirl.com

Instead of finding temporary or short-lived happiness in having the material stuff to keep up with the Joneses, it is a must to keep the long-term independence and security in mind.

Do you have more tips or insights about "social climbing"? Please share!

PS: On a completely unrelated note, did you happen to see the new header above? It's actually accidental! I'm in the middle of rebranding my blog and just thought of doodling on a new header. Then I accidentally deleted the old header. Since ny files are still in my old laptop, I cannot just upload it again. Thus, I had no choice but to upload the new header, giving you a sneek preview of my rebrand! Please stay tuned for more changes in my blog. Yay!