Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts

May 26, 2014

We Were Merely Freshmen

Someone in my Facebook feed shared a photo of our first batch encounter way back (n) years ago. I won't specify dates, but if you can look at the photos, you'll see how most girls wore boot-leg jeans. That should give you an idea.

And oh, the UP Mindanao atrium's walls weren't painted yet. And there was still a giant "ashtray" in the middle of it. And smoking wasn't yet bawal. And the roads were not paved. There, so many hints na.

The photo shared was one of a course different from mine, so I kind of stalked the original owner to look for the complete album. I didn't know the poster but I'm sure she was years ahead of me.

Anyway, I finally found the album and was pleasantly surprised to see many photos. Back when digital wasn't very common, this was a feat! I was even more surprised to see a photo of my bloc - which included me!
 Credits to the photo owner, Tata Sua Peronilla.

We were few but not that few. This photo had more upperclassmen than freshmen, and many of my classmates were probably on the opposite side.

Can you spot me?

May 21, 2014

The Impromptu Beach Trip

I was not able to work nor was I able to blog yesterday because my dad literally woke us up and told us we're going to Samal Island.

Ha?!

We weren't prepared, although we did have a big stock of food inside the fridge. You see, my tita, my cousins, and a nephew of ours arrived from Bicol last Sunday. They are staying in a little hotel near our subdivision (Luxor One Inn), and the arrangement is that they visit our house to eat a meal, i.e. breakfast or lunch.

Yesterday, they visited us early in the morning to eat breakfast at our home when they, apparently, had the idea to go to Samal. Then, they woke us up (I was already awake, but Yuri was still sleeping) to tell us that. What?! Being the good sport that we are - aside from the fact that no one could complain about going to the beach on a summer day - we immediately got up, ate breakfast, and prepared our stuff.


Can you spell haggard??? Just look at that face. And hair! Poor Yuri got woken up from a deep sleep but was excited anyway to go back to his favorite place: the beach!

March 26, 2014

Yuri is 2: 24 Random Things About You

Dear Yuri,

You're 2 today! To mark the first hour of your birthday, uh, you fell from the bed. It's okay because, well, I placed a cushion on that side of that bed. You woke up alarmed with large eyes, and I said, "Okay lang, baby." You closed your eyes again but not before you replied, "Okay nan."

To say I'm absolutely in love with you is an understatement. I completely adore you and I thank God every day for giving you to me, to us. I cradled you back into my arms again (we cosleep), and as you settled down to nurse, I smiled and then I thought of all the random things that you, in all of your two years, have or have not done.

Since you are 24 months today (2 years!), I decided to write down 24 random things about you. I hope you enjoy reading them when you're older!

1. You never drooled. Ever. I remember seeing little babies with bibs which seemed to be permanent parts of their outfits, but not you. You never wore a bib when you were little. Even when you started eating solids, the only time you had to wear bibs were during mealtimes.

2. You were never fussy when teething. In fact, I didn't even notice when your first tooth erupted. Recently, I only noticed that four of your molars were already present. You didn't even make a peep, not a sound. Well, to be honest, you could have been clingier during those times, but I was none the wiser.

3. You were a colicky baby. To this day, I never found out the reason. All I know is that during the first three months of your life, you would cry straight for three hours each night. I did everything I could do, but nothing could stop your crying. You suddenly stopped after three months.

Really?

4. You started sleeping through the night when you were four months old. It was as sudden as when you stopped being colicky. One night, you just slept through the night, of course, while nursing a few times. By then, I stopped being fearful of being alone with you.

5. Yes, I was afraid of being alone with you the entire night. I was only 23 years old, living the life of a single mother, with a colicky baby to boot. This is why we slept in the living room for 3 months.

6. For the first three months of your life, I slept on the couch while you slept on your stroller. The crib was too big for you then, and I was afraid you would feel insecure in it.

7. You are 24 months now (2 years old!), but you have never been to the beach yet.

8. You had to spend the first six days of your life in the hospital because, er, you went out of momma's tummy late (I had to get cut up), and by the time you were out, you already ate meconium, your first poop. So cool, right? I bet you couldn't wait to tell this to your playmates. But remember that it could have caused different complications, and through the grace of God, you came out very very healthy. (Birth story here)

9. Even if I breastfed you for 2 years (and counting), you had S26 as your first food. Nobody taught me how to breastfeed in the hospital (as neither of your lolas were there, and your lolo doesn't know the first thing about breastfeeding).

10. You spoke your first word when you were around 16 months old, and it was "car."

11. You went on your first airplane flight when you just turned 7 months old. We went to Cebu to visit some relatives. I was anxious, but you were very behaved during the flight. In fact, you only cried because you already wanted to nurse, and after nursing, you were fine.

12. Your first tooth erupted when you were 11 months old. It was late compared to other children, but that's okay. Your teeth erupted one by one during the next months anyway.

13. You used to be so wary of strangers, but now, you're warming up. Whenever another baby or kid visits the house, you go out of your way to make him or her feel welcome. You even consider your ninangs as friends now!

With Ninang Teena (or Nina Tina)

14. During your first months, momma wasn't so style-savvy yet, and there was a month when you wore hand-me-down girls' shoes. Don't worry; you still looked so adorable. Of course, you also had boy shoes hihi.

15. You never tore a single page from any book, unlike a certain sister I know who tore almost all of my Clueless books. I still preferred giving you cloth books when you were very little, though, because I was afraid of the chemicals in the ink. After your first birthday, though, we began reading many books!

16. You became obsessed with cars after your first birthday and until now. You even recognize specific neighbors' cars now.

17. You are a carb-monster: You're a fickle eater but your love for carbs remains consistent. Your favorite foods are pasta (w/o red sauce), pancit, bread, crackers, cake... In fact, when we were at Vikings, all you ate were ramen and mantao.

18. Speaking of carbs, your latest favorite food is the humble but glorious suman.

19. You took your first step at 13 months, which is later than some children, but again, it's perfectly okay! You were running a few months after anyway.

20. You are always mistaken for a girl. No matter where we go, someone almost always mistakes you for a girl. Even when you were looking like this:
Seriously?

21. You had a very wide vocabulary even before you turned 2. I always say that you might have been a late walker but your talking skills compensated for it - not that we need compensation!

22. You were potty-trained a couple of weeks before turning 2. Save for a few days of regression, everything else went smoothly. Yay!

23. You currently love dancing and singing. You would dance to any tune you hear on the radio (using your signature rolling hands dance step), and you would try to sing whenever you hear a song you like!
Don't stare at my tongue.

24. You are turning out to be a very sweet and affectionate little boy. A few months back, I prayed that you would show affection more because, well, you're a bit rough like a little boy should be. Now, you're fond of giving kisses, hugs, and you even occasionally tell us "I love you." I love you, too.
___________________

There is more of you and more to you than these 24 random things, baby, and you should know that these are but a few of the things that I hold dear to my heart. I'm pretty sure I will spend a big part of my life telling you more about the things that make you so special to me. Happy birthday and I hope you have fun this day (unlike last year hee hee).
Photo: http://oldbarnrescue.com/
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
I pray you grow up to be a man after God's own heart. God be with you!

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February 19, 2014

Love and Respect in the Family (by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs)

I have a painful childhood memory which remains fresh in my mind. I was 6 years old and awoke to the sound of my parents fighting. I huddled in bed and waited for the house to calm down. I was crying. Minutes later, my mom went inside the room and sat on an armchair. Sniffling, I snuggled up to her. She asked, "Why are you crying?"

"Because you're fighting. And you didn't even get to tell me 'good morning.'"

My mother held me away from her. I can still remember the disgust in her eyes and the contempt in her tone when she said, "You're so selfish. You're such a bad girl. All you could think of is yourself. How very selfish."

I was 6 years old with no understanding of what I did wrong. To be honest, I still believe I didn't do anything wrong. I love my mother dearly and I'm sure she does, too, but at that moment, I've never felt more unloved.

I still think that's the reason why I have trouble expressing love and affection to my family.

I needed to understand why that little moment made such a big impact on me. It eclipses the other low moments of my life, such as the times I failed to meet my parents' expectations. They're painful, yes, but somehow, I was able to manage the temporary loss of respect on me (for a while). I mean, I was able to bounce back. However, not the same could be said for the moments I felt unloved, and I wanted to know why.

Thankfully, God answered my prayer in the form of a book.

I am very blessed to have received a copy of the book, Love and Respect in the Family, written by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, who is an internationally known expert on relationships. I say "blessed" because it opened my mind to the real reason behind the rifts within our families.

To say that this book changed my life is an understatement.

The premise of this book is this: parents and men demand respect while children and women desire to be loved. While both are not mutually exclusive, most conflicts happen when these demands are not met.

When I study the conflicts I've been in, this idea makes so much sense. It's like a light bulb suddenly turned on. Now I understand! Parents get frustrated when they feel they are not respected, while children resent their parents because they feel unloved.

On the other hand, husbands commit sin when they feel their wives don't respect them, while wives get discontented when they don't feel they are being loved. It's a vicious cycle actually. The author even calls it the crazy cycle. 

Come to think of it, everything's already written in the Bible, which makes this book not only credible but also practicable:

For children to respect their parents: Exodus 20:12

For parents to love their children: Psalms 127:3-5

For wives to respect their husbands: Ephesians 5:22-24

For husbands to love their wives: Ephesians 5:25 

The author also offers a very practical guide readers can follow in order to achieve "harmony." The acronym used is GUIDES, and here are the letters' meanings:

G - Give (Not too little and not too much)
U - Understand (Putting yourself in their shoes)
I - Instruct (Not too much but just enough)
D - Discipline (Confront, Correct, Comfort)
E - Encourage (Equipping them to succeed)
S - Supplicate (Praying with confidence!)

What I really like about this book is how it values the imperfection of human relationships. In other books, we are given "tips" on how to handle a clingy child or a secretive husband. If you're looking for tips on how to change another person, well, this might not be for you. However, if you're praying to change yourself, I say that this is a great book to start with.

You see, we always pray to see change in other people. We always pray for them to be more honest, more understanding, more patient. What about ourselves? Change begins in ourselves, and we cannot really do that unless we completely depend on the Lord. This is one of the main points of the book. Human relationships, even in the most ideal families, will never be perfect. However, we can depend on a perfect God whose love is unwavering and unchanging.

Isn't that amazing?

This is life-changing for me because I learned how to treat other people. I can prevent conflict by trying to weigh whether I sound disrespectful or not. I try to avoid being unloving. Finally, I am able to assess my feelings and know when to validate my anger and when to dismiss it.

Of course, I cannot tell you everything I read. The experience is unique because you can read about the cases the writer has handled. You don't need to be a parent to read this and benefit from it. Reading this book does not only teach me how to handle Yuri but also Job, my parents, my siblings, and yes, even the household help. If you are a father, a mother, a daughter, a son, a sister, or a brother, you will benefit from reading this book. 

This just goes to show that every kind of relationship within the family takes work, and you just cannot expect to see results without intentionally treating them with love and respect.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze.com® book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

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