What is a good mom?

Yuri's "gift" to me. A "basket" daw with "bananas."

Hallmark doesn't make any money from me because I don't celebrate holidays except for Christmas, Easter, and birthdays. I looove these major holidays, but I see the "rest of 'em" as just ordinary days.

I don't even celebrate Valentine's Day, much less Mother's Day.

I guess that's just how we were raised. My family is not big on celebrating birthdays na nga, Mother's Day pa? The same can be said for Job, although he tries to send me simple "special" messages on those occasions (but I love the just-because messages more...)

But there's one person who never fails to send me heartfelt greetings on Mother's Day. That's Honey, Yuri's ate or yaya.

Although I'd never admit it to her face (sorry, I was never the expressive type), I feel blessed that God sent her to us to help me take care of Yuri. That's even though she makes me want to scream sometimes, okay, many times. I mean, ako yung may event pero 10 minutes nalang ako nakapaghanda kasi she took 40 minutes to get dressed? Mga ganun.

But that's off-topic hehe. Really, I feel blessed because in spite of her kaartehans and, sometimes, disobedience, I believe in my heart that she truly loves Yuri. I think that's the most important trait you would ever need to find in a yaya.

Going back to Mother's Day, that early morning, while Yuri was still sleeping and I was laughing over a joke Job cracked, I received this text message:

Of course I was touched. Who wouldn't? I don't think all household have helpers who are as thoughtful as Honey. But never being the emotional type, I immediately thought, "Oh no, she thinks so highly of me. Whatever have I done to deserve that?"

First of all, I'm far from the alpha-perfect mom image. I let my child eat sweets and processed foods. I don't really care when he touches something dirty. Sometimes I give him what he wants when he throws tantrums. There have been times when I want Yuri to go away because I'm busy or stressed at work - though I will never have the heart to tell him that.

I am not "the best mom ever." I let Yuri watch TV and play with gadgets so that I can rest after working. I sometimes tell him to pee in his diaper because I'm too sleepy or lazy to get up and accompany him to the potty. Sometimes I let him bite on a toy that I know is dirty. One time, I even let him eat a lollipop.

Thoughts on the Mommy Wars

I am not a fan of the so-called mommy wars. I must admit that I am passionate about the choices I make (i.e. breastfeeding, attachment parenting, and open-ended play) and I have a strong opinion about them, but I will never think of having an actual argument with another parent about these choices.

I am only human so there are times I catch myself judging other parents, but God made me realize I could be easily like them have my circumstances been different.

Now, I've been lucky that in the first two years of Yuri's life, I haven't encountered anyone who debated my beliefs. Sure, I received a couple of comments when Yuri still wasn't walking at 12 months old, but those were from family and family friends. They don't have the right to judge, yes, but I'd rather hear comments from them than from actual strangers. I considered myself lucky for never having them.

But I recently realized that as the child grows up, the "war" becomes less about you and your parenting style and more about the child and his milestones.

Unfortunately, I learned this in one weekend and in two different incidents.

None of these incidents were really harmful - in fact, they were bordering on petty - but it made me see how easy it is to judge other people.

First one is from a dad, an American neighbor, who just happened to pass along our house one Saturday afternoon. He had his son with him who was just a couple of months older than Yuri.

He asked me how old Yuri is and I asked him about his son, too. Then he asked me how many words Yuri can already speak.

You see, at that time, Yuri was just making random noises while playing with the other child.

I hesitated, frankly because I have already lost track. And also because I had to speak in English haha. I started, "Well..."

But he cut me off and said, "Oh he can't speak yet."

"What?"

"He can't speak yet? My son can already say many words. English, Filipino, even some Bisaya words. He (pointing to Yuri) can't speak yet?"

Cuzo before Christmas!

Yesterday afternoon, when I was cuddling with Yuri (there are almost no essay to review this week - everyone has gone vacation mode already!), our yaya announced that the "delivery boy" was there. Surprise, surprise - it was from Cuzo! I was surprised because I wasn't expecting anything to arrive this week, and there are three reasons why.

Actually, I ordered stuff from Cuzo last Friday and paid on Saturday. I have been planning to buy a bag and my Christmas gift to my mom for weeks now, but I was being too fickle (I blogged about my choices here). It wasn't until Friday when I finally decided what to buy.

Another thing that delayed me was the lack of BPI deposit in the payment options. I sent Cuzo a message on their Facebook page but did not really expect a concrete solution (that happens in most customer service experience I've had). Imagine my surprise when they replied and told me to go ahead and order and they'll just give me BPI details I can send payment to! Yay!

The final reason why I wasn't expecting the order to arrive so soon was that I ordered a couple of bespoke items. These are leather goods that are personalized. I ordered them as gifts to my mom, and in fact, I told my mom that my Christmas gift to her will be delayed. My mom will surely be surprised!

Anyway, enough of the talking. Here are some photos I took of the order:

Rumpled packages are not unusual for me - after all, I live in Mindanao.

Leather, nylon, and brass

Sturdy nylon, great leather, thick hardware