If I could describe my general mood for the past weeks, I would say it would be
anxiety. I've been worried and stressed over many things that I also failed to spiritually connect to God on many occasions. It really is true that worrying is the opposite of faith.
I worried about many things: the length of time it has taken for my camera to be fixed, the lack of payment from a friend who borrowed money from me, and the problem regarding my house loan.
Money sure knows how to make the world go round.
Now, faith. Faith is what is what should have made my world go round, but I succumbed to worrying. Because of this, I almost did not hear the prompting of God within me.
My primary problem -
concern - is the housing loan. As a little bit of background, we're almost done paying the equity. In a few months from now, we should be starting paying the amortization.
However, to do that, my application for bank financing must be approved. You see, I'm currently on my "single mom stint" now. Even if Job financially supports us, it is my name that appears on the papers.
Long story.
So anyway, to apply, of course I need to submit work-related documents. I had problems securing a contract from my current "work provider." While I did have a contract I signed 3 years ago, I was advised I couldn't use it because of some legal changes in the system.
Okay, I could live with that. The problem is that I no longer received updates about an alternate document I can submit to the bank. Worse, my follow-up request was not met so well (
I actually wrote about it here).
Uh oh.
My mom, who is also my real estate agent (shameless plug:
Davao Real Properties), scrambled to find another way. She tried to get me officially employed by her real estate office; unfortunately, that backfired. We tried other ways including talking to the developer himself but they didn't work out the way we exactly planned.
I wanted to question God on why this blessing was becoming a burden. I was so sure He wanted to bless us with a home, but why was it so difficult?
Now, this same developer is opening a new subdivision with the same low-cost units. The location is different, farther from the one we originally bought from, but it's good in its own way because it's near my parents' house (where we live now) and even nearer another lot my parents bought.
What made it a practical option is the fact that in this subdivision, the developer offered 5-years 0% interest cash payment scheme. In other words, I don't have to go through bank financing anymore. In other words, I shouldn't have anything to worry about!
On top of that, it's not officially open yet so there are still many corner lots to choose from. Perfect, right?
But I didn't want to consider it because, I don't know, maybe I was ready for a change in environment? Maybe it was because I really wanted to be neighbors with George? Maybe it was because I wanted to transfer to my own home right away?
As opposed to the original house and lot we were paying for, where we can transfer within this year, we would have to wait for around 3 more years in this new one. And that was a major con for the impatient me.
Impatient. Patience. Wait. Wasn't God teaching me a lesson about that? Isn't it one of the ungodly traits I should remove, one of the reasons behind this
waiting season?
Upon that realization, I began to have an inkling of what God was directing me to do. One morning, my mom told me that the bookkeeper had trouble fixing my ITR (for some reason!). In addition to that, the developer offered to have us pay the balance for 5 years instead of just 4 years because we had already paid for a year for the previous development. Because of that, our monthly payment became lower than what it should have been.
Right then and there, I made the decision to transfer. Yes, I wasn't able to consult Job about this one, but there was nothing he can do, too, and time literally was running out for my parents to still grab a good lot. Most importantly, I'm sure God will talk to him Himself.
Yes, there's a bit of belt-tightening involved. I couldn't name figures here, but compared to what we were paying previously, now we have to pay
almost 50% more. That's huge but the reward is a lot that would be more than 20% bigger than the original one. On top of that, it's a property that would be completely ours in just 5 years.
Wow. I'm amazed myself at the turnout of the events.
Sure, there are moments when I ask myself if we could pay that bigger amount every month but God reminds me not to worry. He is in control, and He is faithful.
The point of this post is to tell you that God increases. A lot of us might know this on the theological basis, but it's hard to see it work in the practical daily life.
Here are the ways God increased me during this ordeal:
God increased the problem with the original subdivision; at the same time, God increased the "potential" of the new subdivision. It's like He lowered the old option to raise the new and better one.
God increased our income, and as a result, we increased our
giving. Since God cannot be outdone in
giving, He increased our income even more. Because of that, He gave us the provision to be able to follow His plan about our address.
God increased the amount of money we need to pay for every month, but He also increased the land's size. Oh it's still very little compared to what you may be thinking but God will increase it over time!
God increased what we have to pay for every month; at the same time, it increases self-control and restraint and would increase our knowledge on personal finance.
God increased the time we have to wait for this house to be built; thus, He is also able to increase what patience and fortitude (???) we have inside.
God increased the anticipation we must have and personal sacrifices we must make but He also increased the provision to go through it and the reward to look forward to. God increased the season of planting and, by faith, I claim He will also increase the harvest.
God increases. I increase in God.
Siksik, liglig, at umaapaw.
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